I was sent to jail and gave birth behind bars --[Reported by Umva mag]

After serving time apart from her young son and giving birth in prison, Amanda Tarver is on a mission to break the cycle of incarceration for other families.

Amanda, now 34, was just 22 when she made what she calls a ‘youthful mistake’ by helping her now-husband sell illegal drugs.

At the time, the mum didn’t view this as seriously as she does now.

‘I was young and naive and didn’t think of it as something terrible,’ admits Amanda. ‘We were living in a city where party drugs are notorious, and I didn’t consider that we might be harming people.’

She’d met her partner Legend at a college bar in 2012, and the pair ended up selling drugs to fund his education and help out at home.

However, the authorities soon caught up with them and Amanda was convicted due to her involvement in transferring money and receiving packages to her apartment, while Legend was found guilty of conspiracy to import a controlled substance.

Despite being a first-time offender, Amanda was given a two-year stint behind bars at Coleman Federal Prison Complex in Florida, which meant she was also separated from her six-year-old son, Dorian, who had to stay with Legend’s mum, Maria.

‘I really thought my life was over,’ Amanda recalls. ‘When they told me the verdict, I was in shock. I hadn’t gotten into trouble before and I was a mother, so I expected probation or at least a warning. But none of that seemed to matter.

‘I didn’t know how to explain to Dorian that I would be gone for so long.’

Legend was sentenced to 47 months in jail – then just two weeks later, already behind bars, Amanda discovered she was pregnant.

‘It felt like my identity was broken’

When she was seven months pregnant, Amanda was transferred to a special unit for expectant mothers. ‘It was a warehouse with no windows and thin beds,’ she remembers.

Visits from Dorian once a month helped, but Amanda struggled with being apart from her eldest son and going through pregnancy without her partner by her side.

‘It was an emotional rollercoaster. I didn’t even know if I’d make it to full-term because of the stress and anxiety,’ she says. ‘In prison, I felt like just a number.

I gave birth behind bars. I couldn’t believe this was how Legend Junior (LJ) would spend his first few months of life. It was daunting to have a little baby dependent on me in this terrible institution.’

LJ stayed with Amanda for three months before he went to live with his brother at his grandmother’s home.

Legend, meanwhile, was stuck on the other side of the prison, unable to meet his newborn baby.

‘I had to miss the birth of my first son,’ he says. ‘It was horrible to hear what Amanda was going through, knowing I couldn’t be there for her.’

The only thing keeping the couple connected were the hundreds of letters they exchanged throughout their sentences.

‘When you’re in prison, the only thing you have to look forward to is correspondence from loved ones,’ Amanda explains. ‘I’d write to Legend about LJ – whether he smiled that day or had learned to roll over. We were so close, yet so far apart.’

From prison letters to life-changing charity

When Amanda was released in June 2016, followed by Legend seven months later, the couple knew they wanted to do more than just move on – they needed to help others facing the same challenges.

In 2021, they launched 300 Letters, a charity named after the letters that kept their relationship and hopes alive during incarceration.

‘We realised that the key to staying out of prison is family and having a support system,’ explains Legend. ‘Kids are six times more likely to end up in prison if one or both parents have been incarcerated. We want to break that cycle.’

The charity provides free family therapy, childcare financial assistance, and empowerment support groups for families navigating life after incarceration.

‘Coming home with low self-esteem and having to be a good parent again while rebuilding my professional life was overwhelming,’ Amanda adds. ‘There were so many barriers because of my criminal record. I wasn’t eligible for childcare, even though I needed it to stay on track.

‘That’s why we focus on strengthening family structures and supporting children – because the system doesn’t make it easy.’

300 Letters has already helped more than 400 families and over 50 caregivers of children with an incarcerated parent, offering everything from toy drives to groceries and emotional support.

Today, Amanda works full-time for the charity, while Legend funds part of the work through his job as a lead trainer and operations manager at Legacy Gym.

‘Life is hectic and we work a lot while focusing on our kids – but it’s amazing,’ says Amanda. ‘Helping other families feels like our life’s purpose.’

However, their biggest challenge right now is finding the money to keep the charity going.

‘We’re placing all our bets on getting 300 Letters fully funded,’ Amanda admits. ‘Fundraising remains our most pressing issue, and this is our call to action.’

However, for Amanda and Legend, it’s all worth it.

‘It feels incredible to bring hope to families like ours,’ Amanda says.

‘So many people hear about us through word-of-mouth, which shows how much parents want to prioritise their family and build a positive life after these experiences.’

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